


7 sapphics and the token white boy

by lotusroses



Category: RWBY
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Crack, Everyone is LGBT, F/F, Group chat, Humor, Other, because I said so, penny and oscar are not in the gc but they’re mentioned, same with some other side characters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-20
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:34:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28764897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lotusroses/pseuds/lotusroses
Summary: white and depressed: none of y’all are responding to memagnet is typing............white and depressed: NOT YOU TOO PYRHHAhesbianification: the tiniest violin playswhite and depressed: ren fuck you I'm serious
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long, Lie Ren/Nora Valkyrie, Penny Polendina/Ruby Rose/Weiss Schnee
Comments: 8
Kudos: 42





	1. idiots, all of them

**Author's Note:**

> hey enjoy this modern gc fic of rwbyjnpr being happy and gay because volume 8 doesn't exist here. all my homies hate volume 8.  
> \----------  
> usernames:
> 
> ruby: protagonist tingz  
> weiss: Weiss  
> blake: catgender  
> yang: bodyodyodyody  
> jaune: white and depressed  
> nora: lightning bolt  
> pyrrha: magnet  
> ren: hesbianification

**_protagonist tingz_ ** added  **_bodyodyodyody_ ** ,  **_Weiss_ ** ,  **_catgender_ ** ,  **_hesbianification_ ** , **_lightning bolt_ ** ,  **_magnet_ ** , and  **_white and depressed_ ** to the chat 

protagonist tingz: ayo

catgender: girl what is this

protagonist tingz: a gc

hesbianification: good job stating the obvious 

protagonist tingz: stfu

lightning bolt: wait the gc name. LMAOOOOOO

white and depressed: so y’all just gonna single me out like this 

protagonist tingz: it’s not my fault you’re white

white and depressed: IM NOT,,THE ONLY WHITE PERSON IN HERE

white and depressed: weiss and nora are right there 

catgender: since when do we Not make fun of weiss tho

Weiss: first of all fuck you 

hesbianification: pause 

hesbianification: nora has a pass we agreed on that 

bodyodyodyody: yeah she’s spicy white 

protagonist tingz: NOT SPICY WHITE{€}*2:&;&

catgender: BYEEEEE

lightning bolt: I’m just SITTING HERE

bodyodyodyody: like Italian or scottish spicy 

catgender: ITALIANSJDNND

catgender: she cooka da meatball

protagonist tingz: NOOOSNRBWHBSDHHESB

hesbianification: sto p

white and depressed: i- 

Weiss: all of you are sick

bodyodyodyody: weiss don’t even say nothin bc if i turn the light on you’ll blend in with the walls

lightning bolt: #+%+<#*#*>+#+

hesbianification: GOODNIGHT. 

magnet: ....What is happening?

lightning bolt: HI PYRRHA 

white and depressed: pyrrha pls save me i can’t do thi s

magnet: Why are we in a gc? Just asking.

protagonist tingz: well why not 

protagonist tingz: just a thing for the besties 

Weiss: well it doesn’t seem very “bestie” in here to me

catgender: weiss gets called white and thinks she’s part of the oppression saga 

Weiss: what does that even mean

catgender: you wouldn’t know you’re white 

hesbianification: weiss is still a woman tho

hesbianification: one advantage unlike jaune 

protagonist tingz: true but she would still ask for the manager 

Weiss: NO I WOULDN'T??

white and depressed: I LITERALLY HAVE DONE NOTHING TO YOU PEOPLE

bodyodyodyody: exactly men should always stay in their place

white and depressed: i- 

**_Weiss_** changed the gc name to _**6 bullies, the victim, and the white boy**_

Weiss: sorry jaune that last part is pretty funny i couldn’t bring myself to change it 

white and depressed: .....

catgender: dramatic ass

magnet: Yang may i ask you something?

bodyodyodyody: oh sure

magnet: What does your gc name mean?

lightning bolt: WAIT how do you not know??

lightning bolt: it’s a lyric from the iconic megan thee stallion 

magnet: I’m sorry, who is that? I’ve only heard of her a couple of times through my peers. 

lightning bolt: ....you’re joking right

magnet: I can’t say I am

lightning bolt: god you uncultured soul

catgender: ngl that’s not too surprising actually 

magnet: What do you mean by that?

catgender: well like 

catgender: you just don’t seem like the type to listen to her idk 

protagonist tingz: well to be fair i never would’ve thought ren was a metal head until i actually saw their playlist 

hesbianification: i get that a lot 

Weiss: same 

lightning bolt: the day ren and i found out that weiss liked babymetal was an experience 

hesbianification: remember when she brought her whole speaker into our dorm 

lightning bolt: YEAH LMAO

protagonist tingz: well that explains what the fuck i was hearing upstairs that day 

bodyodyodyody: I’m pretty sure blasting music ain’t even allowed either lmao,,,not that i care

lightning bolt: well we didn’t get any complaints 

hesbianification: right and it ain’t any worse than ruby blasting that noisy ass 100 gecs every other week

protagonist tingz: bruh first of all 

protagonist tingz: that type of noise music is GOOD IT HITS DIFFERENT and you can’t convince me otherwise 

hesbianification: yea ok

bodyodyodyody: I think the most surprising to me was jaune liking kpop 

catgender: HE DOES??

white and depressed: yeah i listen to a few groups but mostly loona and bts 

catgender: L O O N A????

white and depressed: HELP WHY IS THIS SO SHOCKING TO YOU 

white and depressed: DONT MOST OF US IN THIS GC LISTEN TO KPOP ANYWAY

catgender: yeah but i expected you to listen to like,,,dubstep or some of that generic white pop edm shit 

white and depressed: . bye please don’t tell me the rest of y’all thought my taste was that bad

........

white and depressed: the

white and depressed: none of y’all are responding 

  
  


_ magnet is typing.... _

........

white and depressed: NOT YOU TOO PYRHHA 

hesbianification: the tiniest violin plays

white and depressed: ren fuck you I'm serious 


	2. Missing LadyBug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lightning bolt: I’ll send you flying down that staircase with the good ol’ i like ya cut G
> 
> hesbianification: that yee yee ass haircut you got
> 
> catgender: OBZNDJBSDBEJWBDBD

Weiss: guys have you seen ruby

Weiss: it’s already past 11 i’m supposed to go somewhere today with her and penny

………...

Weiss: hello?? are you guys still sleep or something

bodyodyodyody: i think a “good morning” would’ve been fine to get someone to respond

Weiss: shut up that’s not even true 

bodyodyodyody: anyway

bodyodyodyody: I haven’t seen ruby either...penny actually came around and asked me the same thing a little earlier too. she’s not answering her calls

Weiss: well that’s weird 

white and depressed: i heard that she was going to the library with blake earlier 

bodyodyodyody: ?? huh since when does ruby read anything other than comics

white and depressed: they said they were gonna help blake with something 

white and depressed: and I think there are comics in the library too anyway

Weiss: but why would she go to the library so early? right before our date too

bodyodyodyody: hey I’m sure it’s just a misunderstanding

Weiss: i suppose so

Weiss: still really worried though..blake as well.

bodyodyodyody: yea me too neither her or blake have responded 

lightning bolt: whoa it’s soft as hell in here what’s goin on 

lightning bolt: is somebody getting they ass beat

Weiss: lol no

Weiss: ruby penny and i planned to go on a date at 11 and she’s nowhere to be seen. jaune said they left with blake to go the library but 

lightning bolt: since when does she read like blake

lightning bolt: i mean they probably have comics at that library

white and depressed: lol that’s what i said 

  
  


_ hesbianification is typing _

…………

white and depressed: ren are u lurking 

hesbianification: o no sorru

hesbianification: in the middle of somethin i click into imessag accidental

bodyodyodyody: the typos ??? mf what are u doing rn

lightning bolt: he’s playing a game 

bodyodyodyody: ah

lightning bolt: babe two of our friends are basically missing are you’re ignoring it for a bandori score

hesbianification: i didn’t beat it anyway smh 

hesbianification: WAIT HUH

hesbianification: I DIDN’T KNOW? who’s missing??

lightning bolt: ruby and blake

lightning bolt: apparently they went to the library together earlier and aren’t answering anyone’s calls

hesbianification: ruby and….the library??

lightning bolt: i know

hesbianification: did it go straight to voicemail? if so their phones are dead

Weiss: i can’t remember 

protagonist tingz: GUYS HELP

protagonist tingz: WE’RE STUCK IN THE LIBRARY

Weiss: RUBY? ARE YOU OKAY??

Weiss: stuck?! how?

bodyodyodyody: RUBY WTF YOURE OKAY

bodyodyodyody: WHERES BLAKE

protagonist tingz: they’re with me!! her phone is still dead but we’re fine!!!

protagonist tingz: we found someone’s charger :D

Weiss: thank god

bodyodyodyody: thank god 

hesbianification: what kind of luck

hesbianification: still, it’s really good to know y’all are ok :)

white and depressed: ok but HOW the fuck did you lock yourselves in? isn't the library open??

protagonist tingz: well it WAS but since it was so early no one else was there and the librarian left the building and locked the doors. i assume she didn’t know we were still here because it was so empty

protagonist tingz: blake says hi btw 

bodyodyodyody: tell her i love her 

hesbianification: yang they ain’t dying…..

lightning bolt: wait 

lightning bolt: why the hell did the librarian just,,,leave the building like that lmao 

Weiss: that’s what I wanna know!

protagonist tingz: I have no clue 

white and depressed: maybe they’re on break?

Weiss: 1. the library opened just a few hours ago. I don’t think her break is THIS early into her shift 

and 2. do you really have to lock up the entire building just to?? go on break??? 

hesbianification: true

hesbianification: so then where DID she go

bodyodyodyody: who cares

bodyodyodyody: we need to get y’all outta there rn who knows when she’ll be back

Weiss: I agree

protagonist tingz: uh how

lightning bolt: we need to break in

lightning bolt: maybe we can smash a window or something if we can’t pick the lock 

Weiss: No

protagonist tingz: no

hesbianification: no

lightning bolt: what y’all too scared or something?

hesbianification: no you’ll probably get us all caught because you can’t sneak for shit

lightning bolt: WTF YOU’RE SO MEAN TO ME :( 

hesbianification: I’m sorry ily <3

white and depressed: what if we just tell some staff about it? maybe they have a key or something 

Weiss: and if they don’t have a key? then what?

bodyodyodyody: well at least they’ll know what’s going on at that point

protagonist tingz: y’all holy shit 

Weiss: what??

bodyodyodyody: what?

lightning bolt: ^

protagonist tingz: emerald just texted me 

protagonist tingz: she said there’s a ton of students trying to get into the library 

hesbianification: well that’s not a surprise 

protagonist tingz: there are only a few people at the door now but a lot of complaints are being sent apparently 

bodyodyodyody: well do we really have to do anything? pretty much the whole campus knows and it’s not like the other staff can just ignore it 

Weiss: I guess you’re right 

Weiss: we’ll probably have to raincheck our date then 

protagonist tingz: I’m sorry weiss :( maybe I shouldn’t have tried going to the library so early 

Weiss: don’t u dare apologize!! it was all a coincidence and you were just trying to help blake

protagonist tingz: <3 I’ll make it up to u and penny I promise 

Weiss: i know :)

lightning bolt: eww go be gay somewhere else

protagonist tingz: says the one who literally made out with ren on top of the kitchen counter while cooking breakfast that one time 

hesbianification: IN OUR DEFENSE 

hesbianification: we didn’t know y’all were awake 

Weiss: excuses 

hesbianification: fuck you 

catgender: hey my phone isn’t dead anymore 

protagonist tingz: oh yeah I forgot to tell y’all they charged their phone. we’re taking turns now. 

bodyodyodyody: BLAAAKEEEEEESEDEEEKE

catgender: hi yang ^_^

bodyodyodyody: are u doing okay in there? i miss you

catgender: yea u know how often I come here. I’m very used to this place 

catgender: i miss u too :)

Weiss: oh brother

lightning bolt: right

white and depressed: nora and weiss duo name:

“gay and homophobic” 

hesbianification: LMAOO

catgender: NEITHER OF U FORD OWNERS CAN TALK. LIKE AT ALL

catgender: do i Need to bring up the kitchen incident 

lightning bolt: well ruby already did 

catgender: if nobody got me, ruby got me

protagonist tingz: >:)

bodyodyodyody: lmao get their ass

magnet: Hello!!

white and depressed: hi pyrrha!

magnet: Hello Jaune :)

magnet: What are you all talking about?

catgender: the kitchen incident 

magnet: What is that? 

hesbianification: nothing 

hesbianification: anyway

hesbianification: ruby are there still students crowding at the library 

protagonist tingz: yes but some of them are leaving back to the dorms

protagonist tingz: wait don’t even try to change the subject 

lightning bolt: please change the subject 

magnet: I feel like I don’t want to know what this incident is. 

white and depressed: you don’t 

lightning bolt: ignorance is bliss after all

bodyodyodyody: nora and ren made out directly on the kitchen counter while preparing breakfast that one morning we all ate together

hesbianification: YANG

Weiss: and we All saw it

Weiss: well, except you of course

magnet: Oh...well that’s….not too surprising I suppose.

lightning bolt: what do u mean by THAT

magnet: You two aren’t as, well, discreet as you might think. 

  
white and depressed: unfortunately I’ve caught more incidences than just that one 

white and depressed: ironic since ren doesn’t like pda that much 

  
catgender: the fact that you know all of this 

  
lightning bolt: jaune you have ten seconds to shut the fuck up

  
lightning bolt: I’ll send you flying down that staircase with the good ol’ i like ya cut G

  
hesbianification: that yee yee ass haircut you got

  
catgender: OBZNDJBSDBEJWBDBD

  
bodyodyodyody: PLEASE

white and depressed: ok this isn’t fair leave my undercut out of this

lightning bolt: AND I’ll MAKE SURE TO RUB MY SOCKS AGAINST THE CARPET FIRST

  
white and depressed: DONT

  
protagonist tingz: just got an update from emerald 

protagonist tingz: no sign of staff anywhere yet...we might be here a while 

bodyodyodyody: what’s taking them so damn long 

bodyodyodyody: y’all been stuck there for almost 3 hours right

catgender: yeah lol

catgender: much as i love libraries I’m hungry as hell lmao

protagonist tingz: I SECOND THAT ONE

bodyodyodyody: i can imagine :( 

lightning bolt: I’m tellin y’all the administration here sucks ASS

lightning bolt: breaking in is still a good idea yknow

Weiss: and can you think of any way of breaking in that Doesn’t require destroying property and the possibility of all 8 of us getting inevitably kicked out 

lightning bolt: ok well what do YOU suggest we do since you just know every fuckin thing 

Weiss: I say we find that librarian 

white and depressed: I mean that’s an option but what if she left campus too

magnet: We won’t know until we try, right?

lightning bolt: oh we GOTTA do this if pyrrha offers to join 

hesbianification: I agree 

white and depressed: ^^^

bodyodyodyody: LETS FUCKING GOOO

bodyodyodyody: also fuck the staff fr this shit is ridiculous 

Weiss: honestly 

catgender: this honestly feels like a plot point of a shoujo anime or something 

hesbianification: true lmfao

hesbianification: WE ARE the main characters 

lightning bolt: the adventures of 7 sapphics and the white boy 

protagonist tingz: HSBDBAGDHS PLEASE

Weiss: you forgot the victim

bodyodyodyody: no we didn’t 

Weiss: . 

Weiss: fight me

bodyodyodyody: anyway let’s meet up outside at the cafe 

lightning bolt: BET

Magnet: I’ll be there! 

white and depressed: ^

bodyodyodyody: and pls don’t take forever getting ready 

bodyodyodyody: lookin at you ren 

hesbianification: well JEEZ

protagonist tingz: yang it takes you more than half an hour Just to style your hair

bodyodyodyody: AND WHAT OF IT

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lets just pretend there’s a plot going on here

**Author's Note:**

> just like the title says, everyone is sapphic (except jaune lmao) bc I'm gay and love my headcanons so if you don't fuck with that then why are u here?
> 
> here are the hcs btw :)
> 
> ruby: lesbian she/they  
> weiss: lesbian she/her  
> blake: nonbinary bi she/they  
> yang: any pronouns lesbian  
> jaune: transmasc bi he/him  
> nora: transfem pansexual she/her  
> pyrrha: bi she/her  
> ren: genderfluid lesbian he/they


End file.
